Today was very hard to wake up to. The reality is you can't undo the past and you have to live with the regret of your actions or lack thereof. Yes, we all make mistakes, I'm human afterall... I was just involved in something I hate myself for. It's a horrible pill to swallow but it is a part of life, you can only try to learn from your past and to make yourself a better person. These past few months I have tried forcing myself to be happy; taking on a new sport, signing up to classes to improve my Spanish, put myself out there with work and got the promotion I wanted. It worked on some days but when the bad days came, they came hard. On these days I missed my ex with so much passion that it drove me insane. I would cry uncontrollably and beg him to let me talk to him. It was like a drug, after talking for a while my anxiety would disappear and I would feel okay again but of course that was not good. My brain craved that hit of dopamine when I talked with him and I had ...